The Pig Speaks!
by Slyfer Weirdo
Summary: Johnny plays a little anwsering game with a Fat man. Has alot of foul language
1. Are you okay?

Disclaimer:I do not own JTHM (but I wish I did) just this stupid fic so sewing me won't give you anything.  
  
ok this is my first fic so please be nice to me and insult me if you think this sucks cause I don't really care,this fic may have some bad language but what would a JTHM fic be without it,and some violence obviously ok then on with the fic.  
  
******  
  
It was a nice night when Mr. Dons a happy chubby guy that had no worryes in his life decided to walk to the 24/7 and buy a Steamy chili-wanker and some Señor salsa chips when he saw the most unusual person. It was a boy in his mid 20's wearing a long sleeve black shirt with the drawing of a horrible smiley face saying SMILE YOU FUCKER!!,some leather pants with straps on them,and a pair of long boots,he was really skinny and had strange looking black hair. The boy was covered in blood and looked terribly troubled so he decided talk to him ''um..excuse me are you alright''.  
  
Johnny just got out of the his hell house to get some fresh air,after killing that cheerleading squad,they scraped him up like dog about to get fixed. He walked a couple of blocks until he reached his heaven the 24/7 it was the only place that gave him hope thanks to Brain freezies ''um..excuse me are you alright'' he turned around to to see a fat man ,the man was looking at him in a very weird way 'does he know me' he hesitated ''yeah im fine why shouldnt I be fine''.  
  
Why was this boy hesitating ''are you sure,and why are you covered in blood'' after he said this the boy opened his eyes wide and launched at him and knocked him out. When he woke up he was in a chair sorrounded by blades and spikes ''Welcome'' he heard a voice infront of him.  
  
***what happened***  
  
'He knows,I knows but he how...oh fuck no time to think' he lauched himself at the man and hit him on the head with his elbow,smirking wildly he dragged him from street to street 'damm this guys weights more than what he's worth ' after long while of strugle he arrived home and placed him on one of his favorite chairs,he called it The Splatter because the blood always blew everywhere  
  
***back to the present***  
  
''Welcome'' he said when he saw the man awake ''Make yourself confortable'' he was very exited even after opening the cheerleaders heads.  
  
''ooohhhhh where am I'' he felt very drowsy and his head hurt like hell ''Why you're in my house'' he turned his face up to see the boy smiling very creepy ''can you please stop smiling it really makes me unconfortable''.  
  
''SHUT UP'' he yelled ''first let me introduce myself im Johnny C. but you can call me NNY for short''  
  
*****  
  
I know I know it sucks well tell me what you think before I start writting more cause I really dont want to continue if it sucks  
  
well review and tell me how it is so far 


	2. Let the game begin

Disclaimer:you already know I dont own anything  
  
I would like to thank Invader Nicole for being the first person to review and without insults.I thank you alot.  
  
Well here's the second chapter hope you enjoy  
  
*******  
  
''My name is Johnny C. but you can call me NNY for short''  
  
''Nice to meet you,my name is Robert Dons and-''he looked around at the chair ''WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!'' he was so pissed now ''ANWSER ME YOU..YOU..''  
  
''SHUT THE FUCK UP FAT ASS'' he was really getting annoyed by this Robert guy ''oh and the thing you are sitting on is called The Splatter and if you try to run away it will trigger by itself and close on you. In other words squish you with its spikes dus spraying your blood all the over the place,crashing your skull into little pieces,ripping your flesh all over and ending your worthless life,so dont even try to run away'' 'lets see should I kill him now or play a little game with him...I never play games with them why not start now'.  
  
'What the hell is that boy thinking and in the hell did I get into this,and fuck he's smiling like that again' he looked around staring once again at his situation 'ok just relax Robert you're just sitting on a chair that will kill you if you run away with some lunatic that wants you dead...its not that bad'  
  
''I got it!'' yelled NNY ''I want you to say the opposite or make me understand im wrong of what im going to say to you and if I believe any of your bull shit then i'll let you go.....Well after opening your brain and taking all this out of your memory circuit''  
  
''ok that sounds simple enough'' he said with a very confident voice 'well this will be easy as long as I speak the opposite with extreme care he wont kill me. Yeah simple enough'  
  
''What im going to tell you is what I said to an old friend of mine that died almost the same way. So be prepared chubby''  
  
''Im ready give your best shot NNY!'' 0.0 'did I just say that,it sounded pretty stupid damm im already losing my mind with this guy.And did he call me fat im not fat I only weight 301 pounds'  
  
''My friend's name was Edgar (A/N:see issue #2 if you dont know him) he was a very nice man ,but I had to kill him just like the others. Poor Edgar he had so much to live for...well anyways lets begin shall we'' with a wide wicked,creppy,HORRIBLE! smile he creeped closer to Dons until he was just infront of him staring with wild,exited eyes ''you'll wish you were never born.  
  
******  
  
Oh God I know this is short but its what I can come up with cause I have never written fanfiction and its 12.00 am and I really need some sleep.  
  
NNY: You worthless girl sleep is for the weak  
  
SLYFER: SHUT UP JOHNNY! im not in the mood to deal with you  
  
NNY: Oh come on unleast say I havent killed you yet by saying I would give someone a chance.I NEVER GIVE ANYONE CHANCES THEY MUST ALL DIEEEEE!!!!!!.  
  
SLYFER: JOHNNY SHUT THE FUCK UP! you know you look pretty wacky when you're all mad and stuff  
  
NNY: 0.0 what.did.you.say  
  
SLYFER: No I didnt say wacky  
  
NNY: You said it again DIE DIE DIE!!!! *chases Slyfer all over the place*  
  
SLYFER:OH FUCK REVIEW REVIEW! *runs away from Johnny and his blade* IM SORRY IM SORRY!! 


	3. Itch and Question

Disclaimer:Do I have to say it. I think I do I dont own JTHM. there you happy!  
  
ok so in this chapter there's going to be a couple of stuff that happened in issue number two,and I dont write much so dont blame me if this fic sucks like hell. Here's chapter #3  
  
-itch talking-  
  
*****  
  
''You're going to wish you were never born'' smiled Jhonny infront of Dons 'now lets see what did I say to Edgar.....ahh yes''  
  
''Can you hurry up already!'' Mr. Dons was really in a bad mood now ''im kinda in a hurry to move''  
  
''Ok you filthy grease pack first i'll ask you one question''  
  
His eyes whent wide he felt a horrible itch on his butt ''hey can I at least move in this thing, without it killing me'' he stared into Johnny's horrible eyes that were filled with exitment.  
  
''dont interrupt!'' he snaped ''and no you cant move or it will trigger it anyways''  
  
''Oh fuck hurry with your question'' he felt tears filling his eyes as the itch grew from his butt all the way to his head and shoulders (A/N:he he I named a shampoo he he)  
  
''Why are pleople so...unpleasant?'' he started remebering poor Edgar's face when he asked this simple question. A part of him hoped that the guy would anwser something wrong so he would die now.''Well..anwser me''  
  
''people are ahhhh..unpleasant be....because their parents made them like that oh Fuck ahhhh they have been brain washed thinking they are the most uhhh important thing in the world..and they they see everyone as the lower level of themselfs just because they are different ahhh lord help me!!!'' the itch got worse he could acctually hear it talking to him -scrath me Rob scraaaaatch meeeeee-  
  
'0.0 ''Oh fuck. Good anwser and why the hell are you TALKING LIKE THAT IT'S DAMM ANNOYING!'' he was really getting pissed 'this guy was saved this time but next one he wont be so lucky '  
  
''I have an itch in ahhhh my back and head'' he twitched a little bit and the machine's spikes moved closer to him ''isnt it suppose to haaaave splattered me by now!'' he asked while trying not to move anymore.  
  
''It moves closer depending on your speed like now you twiched it moved very slowly but if you moved faster it will close down even faster'' His grin spread even more when he remebered what the 'Pig' said ''and you have an itch..ohhh I wish I could help, but i'm not a farmer to help pigs'' he laughed liked hell at this.  
  
''OH GOD HELP!!'' his eyes were very wide now ' I can hold it just ignore it' the itch came back with a mocking voice -come on you know you want to.I hurt don't I come on Rob scratch meeee- ''oh fuck SHUT UP!''  
  
'what the hell is this guy's problem im not even talking. Oh yeah his itch' ''come on cant you take it or you can move to end it. But you will end more than the itch. Won't you'' he was very happy right now  
  
''JUST HURRY WITH YOUR NEXT QUESTION OR WHATEVER ALREADY!!''  
  
''alright you simple butter maggot , but remember this one won't be so easy'' with a huge creppy grin on his face,he moved back and thought back at the time with Edgar for his next question.  
  
*****  
  
ok I think this is better than my last 2 chapters and I like to thank the few people that have reviewed and I hope you like this chapter it took me a while to write it and the 'PIG' will speak to Johnny more about life in later chapters so be patient im updating as fast a I can.  
  
NNY: *attached to a wall with straps around his hands and feet* GET ME DOWN FROM HERE YOU BITCH  
  
SLYFER: NO!! you tried to kill me so now suffer *grins*  
  
NNY: *sigh* ok ok im sorry now can you let me down from here *makes a cute face* please  
  
SLYFER: let me think hmmmm NO!!  
  
NNY: 0.0 you will pay someday.  
  
Please for the love of my Nail Kitty review ^ ^  
  
0 0 


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